Under The Willow Tree
by AmbroseLunatic
Summary: Juice is dealing with the death of Darvany and Miles. Takes place right after Juice attempted suicide. Juice Ortiz/OC Nikki
1. Chapter 1

**_So I just started watching Son's of Anarchy on Netflix, and I am head over heels in love with Juice Ortiz. So this story takes place right after Juice's attempted suicide. He is battling his feelings for killing Darvany and Miles. He is also trying to sort out and make sense of all the shit the club is going through. I haven't seen the last season, and I know, because I had to look it up, that Juice dies in the last season, but this is just a look at the alternative that could have happened, along with my own fantasy. So I hope you guys enjoy it, let me know if I should keep on going, or leave this as a one shot. _**

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**_Chapter One_**

She ran around the willow tree, away from him. A squeal burst through her lungs, past her ears, and danced into his head. There wasn't a thing he wouldn't do for her, and she knew that. Another squeal escaped her lips as he tackled her to the ground, giggling like children in a playground. It was Nikki who quieted down first. Taking in his complexion, his smooth olive colored skin felt electric under her touch. His bright brown eyes filled with life and love, melted into hers, and that smile that… that wide smile that spread from ear to ear, showing off his pearly whites, he truly did melt her heart, and make her stomach do flips, which was something she wasn't used to until she met him, Juan Carlos Ortiz, Juice for short. In her eyes, he was truly perfection, even with his short Mohawk, and tattooed head.

It had taken Juice years of therapy to come to terms with his past, but he got there. Now Juice was a free man, he didn't have to take orders from anyone anymore.

Nikki reaches her hand up, pressing her palm against Juices cheek; he smiles a soft smile, and covers her hand with his. "Don't ever leave me." She begs in a quiet whisper. He knows why she needs him so badly. It was the only thing that could pull him out of his funk, and maybe in some twisted way, him saving her life had been a burden lifted off his shoulders for what he did to Darvany. He had promised her before he wouldn't let anything else bad happen to her, after he found her a broken bloody mess in the public showers.

He hated those showers, which were used to make sure no one would do anything stupid in there. The nursing staff watching your every move in fear of taking a blade to your own wrist, or possibly and quite literally drowning yourself in the cold water that dripped down from the shower head.

The public showers consisted of a bathtub to the right when you first walked in, a large scale to the left, two small shower stalls to the right of the bathtub, and further down was a sink, and mirror with a small shelf to hold your belongings, dare you put them down, and to the right of that sat two toilets, separated by a wall. There were no doors, only a curtain that was too short to fully cover the entrance to the toilet. The rule was, two people could shower at the same time, as long as they were of the same sex, unless otherwise said by the doctor or requested privacy from the patient themselves.

"I don't plan on going anywhere, baby." Juice said, before leaning down, and pressing his lips to hers. Nikki eagerly pulled him closer, her arms wrapped around his neck, as she rolled over onto her back, pulling Juice with her so he was now on top of her. They were true love birds, not one of them ever left the other's side. It was like a secret code between the two of them. If they were together, they couldn't be broken, and that was how they lived.

**_Seven Month's prior_**

Nikki had been a sad case of a broken girl, young and naive at the time, and the only survivor of a brutal attack on her family. She was left with scars from multiple stab wounds along her body, not to mention the mental wounds that would never leave her broken fragile mind. She was now homeless, except for the Charming Institute for Troubled Youth and Young Adults, which promised psychiatric help to those between the ages of twelve and twenty five. Nikki was also, now, family less. Nikki literally had nothing except the blood soaked clothes she was brought in with.

Nikki had become easy prey in the short three months she had been housed in CITYY, and fell victim to several physical assaults, not to mention the stares, and the whispers that haunted her ears when she would walk past prying eyes. She knew what they were thinking. Her whole family taken out, violently, and she was the only one who survived, rumor had it, and she had been the one to go crazy with the knife, then in a fit of insanity turned and brutalized herself. The only problem with that was, it wasn't true. There had been a group of three men that broke into her house, and killed her mother, father, and little brother. She was the last one, to be dealt with. The three men had taken turns stabbing her, and rapping her until her body fell limp, and she stopped breathing. It was her blood curdling screams that caught the neighbor's attention, and forced her to call the police. She had lost too much blood, and was slipping into death when the police arrived, but a good medical team and forced her to pull through. It was the state that deemed her unfit to be in public, and then forced her into the mental institution. Not yet eighteen years old, there wasn't a damn thing she could say about it, and to be honest, she didn't really want to.

On this particular afternoon, she had walked past a group of guys, and of them had their arms dangling around girls' shoulders. It was hot out, and so, Nikki rolled up the grey scrub pants that were given to her, and then rolled up the top to just under her breasts, showing off her mid-section, and her legs. The guys were staring, but Nikki paid no mind to them, and continued walking down the hallway. That was until someone pulled her into the bathroom. Her eyes grew wide with terror, as she turned around, and realized it was the group of guys that had been watching her. One punch to the face, and she had blacked out, only to be woken up in a pool of her own blood, and being cradled by this strange boy with tattoo's on his head. It was then that their bond started, and he had vowed to never leave her side again.


	2. Chapter 2

**_Thank you for all the reviews and follows. Thank you to TeamBlaus4EVER, stordec23, and fire1 who were the first to review the first chapter. I hope you all enjoy this chapter. There is some smut in here, nothing to hardcore. Hope you all enjoy it. R&amp;R my loves!_**

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**_Chapter Two_**

Nikki woke up in a panic at the feel of an empty bed. Sweat beading on her forehead, the dream she had was so real, her past and present colliding together, and Juice was right in the middle of it. Without warning, a scream escaped her lips, and tears cascaded down her cheeks. It was so real.

Those terrifying men that had invaded her life not that long ago, and taken away her family and youth had come back for vengeance, brutally killing Juice right in front of her. Payment for her testifying against them at the trial and putting them away for life, she knew that was impossible, they weren't getting out of jail anytime soon if at all. She had heard that two of them could possibly get parole in fifteen years, but it wasn't likely with the brutality of the crime they had committed.

Juice heard her screams and cries, and jumped out of the shower, he was right in the middle of, to tend to his girlfriend.

Completely nude, and soaking wet, with the ceiling fan going, even on low speed, it was enough to send little chill bumps over Juices skin, but he ignored them. Instead he focused his attention on Nikki, who had her face buried in her knees. Her body shook with her sobs. He sat down next to her carefully, "Nikki." He called out her name softly, maybe to get her attention, but to also let her know that it was him that would be touching her, something he learned to do a long time ago. Carefully, he touched her arm, then her shoulder, it was then that she finally looked up at him, and she sniffled, and threw her arms around his cold wet neck. He didn't hesitate in embracing her, it's what she needed, and that's just what he gave her.

"Hey baby, don't cry, everything is alright. Shhhh. It's okay." He repeated those words to her, until she was able to stop sobbing. Nikki looked up into Juice's eyes giving him a weak smile, "I didn't mean to interrupt your shower." She said, tears still dripping slowly down her cheeks. Juice cupped her face in his hands, wiping away her tears with his thumb. "Don't be sorry, baby, I wanted too." He leaned down and pressed his lips to hers. She sucked in a breath, and in a moment, everything was better. She smiled up at him, biting her lip as she did so in realization that he was dripping wet, and naked. He caught that playful glint in her eye, and he smiled down at her, "But if you really are sorry, maybe you should come help me out, y'know, wash my back…" Juice winked, and smiled that wide happy smile he portrayed so well.

She smiled, and stood up. Standing directly in front of him, as she slowly pulled _his_ shirt over her head revealing her completely naked body for him. She smiled, taking her bottom lip between her teeth, as she backed up, curling a finger at him as she did so, as if to say _follow me._ And follow her, he did.

The water cascaded down their bodies, like the droplets of a waterfall, beautiful and tranquil. Her back pressed against the tiled shower wall, her arms clinging hopelessly around his neck, much like his own arms that were firmly wrapped around her waist.

Their bodies pressed together in a tight embrace, their lips and tongues locked in a passion filled kiss. It was only when Juice lifted her up, her legs wrapping around his waist for support, and he slowly entered her, only then did they break apart. She gasped for breath as he filled her.

He dipped his head down, just above her collar bone, placing a kiss just above it, then trailing a line of kisses up along her jawline, and up to her lips. This time it was Nikki who took his lips into hers, and with that, Juice pulled out, then slowly pushed back in. Nikki's breath escaped her body, and she put all her effort into that kiss, her body already trembling. It was amazing how the slightest movements always made her body ready to come undone. It was something that Juice took pride in, and was highly proud of. He loved listening to her breathy gasps, loved with she pleaded with him to keep going, loved when her body shook under his touch, loved the hazy look in her eyes as their bodies climaxed. And when she did, her body stiffened around his, their fingers enlaced with each other's. His face resting on her shoulder, as they both caught their breath.

As their bodies came down from the high of love making, Nikki planted her feet on the ground of the shower. Juice pulled her into his embrace, placing a tender kiss on her forehead, "I love you." He whispered.

It felt good to him, being like this, it was something he wasn't used to doing, loving someone so intimately. Sure he had other girlfriends, but they were more for show than anything, good looking, curvy body, big tits. They were just there to make him look good. Just like the crow eaters, they were there to service the club member's needs. Juice had spent many nights with one, sure he was satisfied after, but he could never picture himself long term with anyone, not until he met Nikki.

Nikki had been a fresh start, someone who knew nothing about the club, or the way things worked with them. She was young, beautiful, and smart. She was only seventeen when they met, that first day when he found her in that bathroom, he had been twenty five. She had been unconscious for almost an hour, and the entire time he stayed by her side, holding her hand, whispering for her to come back to him. There was an instant connection between the two, he felt it. And when she did open her eyes and wake up, she felt it too. She didn't want him to leave, and asked him to stay, and he did until he was forced out by the doctors and nurses.

Then when it was time for him to check out, and carry on with this life, because of his age, they could no longer care for him. They advised him to therapy treatments three times a week. Nikki was devastated. It was technically illegal, their love forbidden by law, but what was Juice to the law anyway? He had always run with the wolves, why was now any different? Nikki was three weeks away from turning eighteen, and would most likely have been forced to stay in that institution until she turned eighteen, because, well, where else was she supposed to go, foster care? She wasn't mentally well enough for that yet, not to mention she was much too old. Nobody wants an adult child to care for, everyone wants a baby, or a child young enough they could still hold in their arms and tell stories to. So Juice put his best foot forward, he wasn't going to spend another night that that damn place, and neither was Nikki. They had escaped together, during the night when the staff was past the point of caring what was going on around them. It was quiet enough; they knew the doors they could take that wouldn't sound off any alarms. The only thing they had to do now was keep a low profile until Nikki turned eighteen.

Juice had money from the club, and some of his investments outside of it. It wasn't much, but the amount was enough to get them out of the state for a while.

Nikki rode on the back of Juice's Harley, through the night, her hands wrapped firmly around his waist; her head lay against his back. They had no idea where they were going, someplace where they could be safe, even if it was just for the night.

Finally around five thirty in the morning, they stopped at a motel right outside of Las Vegas, it was untouched territory as far as Juice knew, they would be safe.

Nikki had been nervous the entire time Juice was checking in. Before they even entered the motel, she had stopped him, trembling, "What if they recognize me, and they send cops and bring me back to CITYY?" Juice wrapped her in a tight embrace, kissing the top of her dark brown curly head, "No one is going to recognize you. Just stay behind me, or go sit down, let me do the talking." Together, they walked in, hand in hand until Juice pulled away, and motioned for Nikki to go sit on the green colored couch. Within minutes, Nikki wasn't sure how long exactly, her eyes had closed as soon as she sat down, exhausted from the riding all night.

Juice shook her awake, "C'mon, let's go." He said, handing her a card key. "We're on the second floor, room 211." Nikki just nodded her head in response too tired to say much of anything.

When they got to their room, Nikki was the first one to go inside. Wooden walls and thing blue carpet. There was only one full sized bed, a large window which was covered by a thick light tan curtain, and a small round table for two in front of it. The blanket matched the curtains, and the sheets were white. There was a set of white nightstands on each side of the bed, each with its own light and some Las Vegas travel magazines. Across from the bed was a long dresser, with a decent sized flat screen television. There was also a small hallway which lead to a double sink, and a door to the left with housed a small shower bathtub combo and a toilet. It wasn't the prettiest room, but it would do for now.

The awkward part would be sharing the bed with a guy who was almost eight years older than her. Nikki was a good girl from a wealthy family, and a bright future. She didn't date, because it was a rule her father had made before him and his wife decided to have kids. "_No dating until you are of legal age."_ Nikki's eyes brimmed with tears as she recalled her father's strong voice booming through her memory. She was embarrassed, and silently apologized to her father.

"We should get some sleep." Juice said in a hushed voice, pulling Nikki from her thoughts. Quickly she wiped away her tears, and turned to Juice who was standing awkwardly by the bed. He knew about Nikki's past, and her promise to her father, it was the very reason why they had yet to have a first kiss, she turned him down. The only physical contact they had between them was holding hands, and hugging each other good night before it was time for bed. Juice was fine with that, for now, he had respect for the girl in front of him. She wasn't at all like the porn stars at Luann's studio. She wasn't like the crow eaters, she was just… her, a seventeen year old girl, whom he had fallen in love with. A broken seventeen year old girl who had her world ripped apart.

"I'll sleep on the floor." Juice said, giving her a half smile to reassure her that it was okay. He reached over and took the white pillow from the bed, and sat down on the floor next to the bed. Nikki bit her lip, and fidgeted, before making her way to the opposite side of the bed, and crawling in under the blanket.

Despite the warm weather, she felt cold, and pulled the sheets up to her chin. "Good night." Juice whispered. "Good night Carlos." She called out. Carlos because Juan didn't suit him she said, _"It sounds like a grandpa name."_ She said with a giggle. _"That's because it was my grandfather's name." _ A man he never met. _"What about Carlos?" _She asked him. "_Carlos was my uncle. The only male figure I had to look up to. He died when I was eleven." _

The room was quiet, and she felt awkward and lone in such a large bed. She wasn't used to so much space, even at home, she had a twin sized bed, and thought that was large. She tossed and turned, trying to get comfortable, but she just couldn't. She moved the pillow from under her head to her chest, hugging it, trying desperately to take comfort in something. She had never been in a situation like this before, and right now, she felt so alone. She wasn't even officially an adult, and she had broken out of a psych ward and run off with a guy much older than her. She was afraid the cops would come, and take her away, or take Juice away. They would bring her back to CITYY and she would never get the chance at a free life or love again. Juice would end up in jail, and they would never see each other again. She would be alone, she wouldn't have anyone to protect her the way he did.

She sniffled, didn't even realize she was crying until she felt the tears rush down her face, down her chin, down her neck where they tickled her and then disappeared somewhere on her skin.

Juice heard her cries, sat up, flicked on the light, and looked over at the bed. He had taken off shirt, because frankly, he couldn't sleep in clothes. It wasn't him. He didn't have a problem with his body image, but decided to keep the pants on to spare the innocent girl in the room. He didn't think to put the shirt back on, his only focus was to calm Nikki down.

"Hey, what's wrong?" He asked in a soft voice, as he scooted onto the bed. He wanted to reach out and touch her, pull her into him, but he didn't want to push her limits, not right now. "I'm scared." She sobbed, "The cops are going to find out, and think you kidnapped me. They will arrest you and put you in jail, they'll take me back to CITYY and I'll never get out. We'll never see each other again." She was hysterical now, as if speaking it out loud would somehow make it true. Juice smiled, and scooted closer to her, "Come here." He whispered, and she did. Didn't even hesitate to accept the invitation he had given her to fall into his arms, she did so with pleasure, feeling at peace whenever she could be with him. "Stay with me." She pleaded. "I'm not going anywhere." And just like that, they fell asleep in each other's arms for the first time.


	3. Chapter 3

**_Chapter Three_**

Nikki and Juice had spent three weeks in that crappy motel room, and by the end of it the two had been stir crazy. It was better though, than being locked up in a mental ward when you had all your mental capabilities about you. That was truly the hardest thing, surrounded by people who were truly out of their minds, but together they made it through, and were now making it work.

For the first time in his life Juice had a clear picture of a "normal" life. He could picture himself sitting in a house somewhere, Nikki by his side, they would be married, maybe even have a child or two. They would have their family dog. There would be no more club, no more killing, no more drug dealing, no more prison, no more being stepped on just because. He could really be free, but what about money, what about Chibs and Happy? What about SAMCRO? Who would he be without his kutte? Could he be normal? Could he earn straight? Could he provide for Nikki the way the rest of the guys did for their old ladies, because the club was the only way of life he knew. He had never held down a real job. In fact until he started prospecting with the Sons he hadn't had a job. He made his money by stealing and selling. The real money was with SAMCRO, so could he really change? Who was he without the club? He had no other identity. And the most important, would he be accepted back, or would he be killed?

Nikki had asked him, "What's wrong?" He couldn't keep his past a secret, not when he wore the heart of SAMCRO on his sleeve, Kutte or no Kutte. He sighed, tired of lying, tired of hiding. If this relationship was going to work, he had to be honest, and that alone most likely will send her packing.

"I don't want any secrets between us." Juice said, his eyes tearing up as he spoke those words, this was it.

"What do you mean?" Nikki asked, her face crinkled up trying to make sense of the words Juice spoke. If he didn't want any secrets between them, that means he already has them and wants to clear the air. Then it occurred to her that he knew everything about her, but the only thing that she knew was that he was half Puerto Rican from Queens who moved to California at the age of eighteen, and lived off of money from investments that he owned part of, and the only reason he ended up in CITYY was because of an attempted suicide. The topic was always too sensitive to talk about, he would always tell her, "Give me time, I'll tell you one day, just not today." Nikki was always fine with that, now she was wondering if he was ready to talk about it.

"I don't want to keep secrets between us." Juice said again, "Before I tell you, just know that I didn't tell you because I didn't want to lose you. I'm sorry I didn't tell you before, I just didn't know how."

"You're starting to scare me, Carlos." Nikki was sitting curled up in one of the chairs at the small round table. Juice took a step towards her, cupping her face, "Please, don't be scared." Juice then sat at the edge of the bed directly across from Nikki.

Juice rubbed his hands nervously over his legs, and took a deep breath before starting. "When I came to California, when I was eighteen, I was young and dumb, and in need of quick cash. I didn't know anything except computers and motorcycles; those were the only two things I was ever good at. I heard about. I had seen a group of bikers around Charming. They always seemed like a good group, never really caused any trouble, and the Chief of police seemed to be on good terms with them.

One day I was just out for a ride, and I came across Teller-Morrow automotive repair. I pulled in, and started talking with the club owner. Before I knew it I was Prospecting for SAMCRO. I patched in a year later, and worked mainly on the computers, getting information for the club when they needed it, and also helped them with their repo when they got the calls in.

Things were fine, the money was rolling in. Most of the profit we made was from selling illegal guns. There were never any problems, until the following year. I don't know how it happened, things just got out of hand, and everything went to shit. We got into selling drugs, the money was good.

One day the cops picked me up to take a random drug test. After that they just kept hounding me, picking me up randomly. They started threatening me, telling me that they would tell the club about my dad. That's another thing I didn't tell you, I'm half black."

"That's not bad, Carlos, what's wrong with that?" Nikki questioned, she could see the hurtful look on his face, and the strain in his eyes, it pained her to see him that way.

"No blacks allowed in the club. ATF got involved, asked me to get a sample of the drugs we were selling. I never wanted anyone to get hurt." Juice paused for a moment, trying to push the tears away, but just like before, they had a mind of their own, and spilled onto his cheeks.

"It's ok baby." Nikki said, moving over to the bed, and wrapped her arms around him. She kissed his temple, and tried to calm him down the best she could.

"I took a block, and hid it in the woods. I was going to get it later, and take some, then put it back before the guys could notice it, but it all happened so fast, and I couldn't get it back in time. Our President, the same guy who got us into this mess, started questioning the prospects. I came up with a better plan. All they had to do was go look for it. I was going to put it back. But Miles caught me with it, he had me at gun point. He was going to bring me back to the table, they would have killed me. I didn't want to die. I didn't want to kill anyone. I didn't want anyone to get hurt, because of me, because of ATF." Juice gasped for a breath, sobbing uncontrollably now.

"I threw the block at him, I was going to run, it all happened so fast. He shot me in my leg. We started fighting, I shot him, killed him. Set it up so it looked like he took the drugs." Juice stopped again, waiting for Nikki's reaction. He could tell she was trying to make sense of it all.

"That's the reason you tried to kill yourself?" Nikki whispered. Juice nodded, "I took a chain, tried to hang myself in the tree, next to where Miles was buried. The branch broke, and I fell. I passed out, and when I woke up, one of the guys, Chibs, was my best friend, was looking for me. He found me, helped me, but I couldn't keep what I did to Miles a secret. I told him everything. Around that time we had a new president, Clay's stepson, Jax.

Chibs told Jax what happened, he wasn't okay with what happened, but they accepted it. Chibs was watching me, making sure I didn't fuck up.

Jax was trying to get us out of guns and drugs, and was doing good with that. Then one day there was a shooting at a Catholic school for kids. The gun that was used was one of ours. The kid got a hold of it, and shot up the school. The kids mom was devastated, she lost her son, but she also had the blood of all those lives on her hands as well. She was a junkie.

She wanted to rat, Jax had her tied to the bed to keep her in the house and keep her quiet.

Jax told me that I had to kill her, and if I did I'd be good with him and the club. It was only between us. He put that on me. He handed me some drugs for her, I injected them into her arm. Then I put the pillow over her head, until she stopped struggling."

Nikki moved away from Juice, backed up against the wall, she was crying now too. Seeing her like that caused Juice physical pain, he tried crawling to her, but that made Nikki curl up against the wall even more. "Don't touch me!" She cried, "Don't come near me." That stopped Juice in his tracks, and he fell backwards, as if her words had pushed him back. He couldn't breathe.

"I would never hurt you. I love you, I wouldn't do that. That isn't me. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

They were both crying now, after a few minutes, Juice opened his mouth to finish.

"I had kept that secret for a long time, I couldn't let anyone know. The guys were tired of seeing me depressed, so Bobby handed me some of his Oxy, told me to go to Diosa and get laid.

Before I left I took a few pills. Took some more when I got there, I started feeling funny. I lost count of how many I took, and I just wanted the pain to stop, so I took more. I was getting a massage, when I overdosed. Gemma, Jax's mom and Nero, the owner of Diosa, the two of them are also dating, forced me to throw up the pills. Nero stayed with me, got me up and walking around. I could hardly understand what was going on around me. I thought I had told him about Darvany, what I did to her. I wasn't supposed to … it just all came out.

Jax found out somehow. I was going for a run a few weeks later, and he hugged me goodbye, and told me that I had betrayed him.

I knew then I had to get away. I couldn't stay there because Jax was going to have me killed."

"You killed people, Carlos. How do you think I should feel about that? My whole family was murdered, I was almost killed."

The tears between the two hadn't stopped, didn't even ease up. Juice was reliving the pain that he had caused so many people. He had never gotten over what he had done, not to Miles or Darvany.

"I know baby, I know, and it's killing me. I didn't want to live anymore because of what I've done. You changed that for me. I'm not a bad person, I'm just fucked up. I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Please baby, don't … I wouldn't never hurt you. I love you too much."

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**_I hope these chapters aren't too confusing. They do drift between past and present._**

**_Also have a special treat for you lovelies in the next chapter, if I get at least 5 reviews today I will post the next chapter tomorrow morning. R&amp;R, let me know if you think Nikki should forgive Juice._**


	4. Chapter 4

**_Thank you sooooo much for all your support guys! I really love your reviews, so keep them coming! Speaking of which, hope you all enjoy, this chapter should be a real treat! *wink wink* R&amp;R guys!_**

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**_Chapter Four_**

Nikki hadn't moved the floor. She sat knees pulled up to her chest. She was tired. Tired of running, tired of hiding, tired of pretending she could ever have a decent life again. How could things have gone so wrong? Nothing made sense anymore, and how ironic was it that her family was killed, and she fell in love with a killer. Maybe she had a death wish. But Juice had proved his death wish many times in the past, that is, if she took his word for it. Maybe they were perfect for each other, maybe.

"What do you want from me, Carlos?" Nikki asked. The room was dark, and neither one of them had made the attempt to get up and turn the light on.

"I wanted you to know the truth. You deserved that much. I'm not going to ask you to stay, if you feel like you can't be with me that's fine. I'm not going to force you, but I want you to know I love you, and I mean it, I would never hurt you. I told you because I have a way out, because we can't stay here in this motel room for the rest of our lives, and because I have a life in Charming, with the club. I have money with them; we can live a decent life together. I can take care of you. You have to tell me what you want."

"You want to go back to the people that want to kill you?" Nikki asked, sounding disgusted.

"I need to make it right somehow. I owe them that."

"You don't owe them anything. Two murders that stained your hands when it should never have reached them." Nikki crawled over to Juice, who was sitting with his back up against the bed, across from where she was sitting. She stopped when her knees hit his, and carefully took his tear stained face into her hands. "You saved my life. That counts as something. I trust you. I know you wouldn't hurt me."

Juice sighed, relief flooded his body, "Thank you." Nikki pressed her lips against his, slowly, tenderly, and full of passion.

Juice moved from sitting in a cross legged position to his knees. Now hovering just above Nikki, he was able to pull her closer to him, their tears mixed together, falling together between their lips, onto their tongues. Nikki moaned into the kiss. Their bodies worked in sync with each other, and before they knew it, they were both laying on the bed. Nikki was resting on top of Juice's body, his hands traveling up and down her torso. It wasn't until he felt comfortable enough to allow his hands to travel under her shirt. He savored the feel of her silky smooth skin under his fingers for the first time.

Nikki was surprisingly at ease under his touch, in fact, she was surprised to find herself really enjoying his touches. Soon she began to get frustrated, there were only so many places his hands could travel before clothing got in the way, and she found herself sitting up, straddling his hips, and removing her shirt. It landed somewhere on the floor behind her, maybe even on the table, where ever it landed, it didn't matter for the time being, because she was too caught up in this moment to really care.

Juice laid back, watching Nikki as she discarded her shirt. It was the first time he had seen her like this, even just partially naked, she still had her bra on, wait… nope, not anymore, that came off too. It flew behind her, just like her shirt did. He smiled, taking in her beautiful figure, her small rounded breasts, and milky white skin, she was beautiful, more beautiful than he imagined.

Nikki stayed in the same position, straddling his hips, her upper body completely bare, and under the big brown eyes of Juice. She bit her lip, and because of her past and her feeling of insecurity, she covered herself up. Juice frowned, and reached up, touching her face. "You don't have to be shy with me. You are so beautiful. I don't think you know just how beautiful you really are." With that, Juice flipped them over, so he was hovering above her, she still covered up her chest. Juice stood up, and removed his shirt. Nikki gasped at his beautiful physic.

She had always known about his toned arms, and could feel his toned abs through his shirt when she went to hug him, but she had never seen him this way, in fact, she had never seen a man this way before. Her stomach filled with millions of butterflies, and her cheeks were on fire. She did her best to ignore it though, and just take in his body. His chest sported two tattoos of skulls, and something else, looks like some sort of Asian print on the left side, towards the top of his rib cage. His abs weren't over done like a lot of people, but they were there, perfect, and just enough.

Then he climbed back onto the bed. Nikki welcoming him back into her arms, their lips met again, and Nikki lay back down. Juice resting on top of her, between her legs, as he started grinding his hips into hers. She moaned into the kiss, and eventually pulled away. She was trembling, nervously. Juice picked up on that, and moved away, just enough to give her a second to adjust to all of this.

"We don't have to do anything." Juice said, "We can stop right now if you want to?"

"No, no. I'm just… a bit… nervous. I know I'm technically not a virgin anymore, because of what happened, but I don't know what I'm doing, this is really my first time." Nikki was starting to ramble, and Juice cupped her face, kissed her lips, until she stopped talking.

"Tonight you are a virgin, if that's what you want. You lead; we do this your way. I'm not going to force you into anything. Tonight belongs to you. That means you call all the shots."

Nikki started crying. She remembered how rough those men were with her, how they used to body. How they treated her like a rag doll. Her virginity was taken from her, forced from her body in the most brutal way possible. She never wanted another person's hands on her body ever again, but Juice came along and changed that for her. She really did love him, and she wanted him.

"I love you." Nikki said through her tears, "Just go slow, and be gentle." Juice nodded, "If you say the word, I will stop." Nikki nodded this time, and bit her lip.

She looked at Juice, as if giving him the okay to keep going. He reached over, pulling her towards him, he kissed her, full of passion. Then trailed his lips down to her neck, where he flicked his tongue over her vein, before sucking on it. Nikki's head fell to the side, giving Juice full access to her neck.

Nikki had so much to learn about love and sex. When it came time for her parents to have _"the talk" _with her, they told her that sex happens when you fall in love, but not before marriage. They handed her a promise ring, she promised them she would wait until she was married before she had sex. She would keep her body pure and clean until then. There was never any talk of how it worked, no mention of what exactly sex involved. No mention of men forcing themselves onto women. She was raised in a strict Christian household, and up until her family was murdered she had believed heavily in god. Now she hated him. She had spent endless nights praying to him to keep her and her family safe. She had come to terms that god was just like Santa Clause or the Easter Bunny, they were all just myths. Parents used god to make them fear the devil, used him to make them behalf, and act accordingly. Life was not what she imaged it to be. She wouldn't be getting married, and having children, and on Sunday's her and her husband with their children would meet their parents at the church, then afterwards, they would all go to their house for Sunday dinner. That wasn't her life, it would never be. God didn't exist, but the devil did, she was sure of that, or maybe they were two in the same. She remembers her neighbor telling her something about god taking the best of people for himself, why would he take them in such a gruesome manner? Why make them all suffer, why take a mother and father away from the child, better question, why would he let the child survive without the family? None of it made any sense, and from that day forward, she loathed god and the devil just the same.

Nikki was pulled from her thoughts when she felt her pants, and her panties being pulled off. Before she knew what happened, Juice had discarded the rest of her clothes, and she lay there completely naked. Her face flushed, as she desperately tried to cover herself up. Juice stopped her, lacing his hands with hers, "Don't hide, you are so beautiful." He whispered into her ear, before kissing her once again.

Juice trailed his tongue down her body. Her stomach doing all sorts of flips and flops, she was sure there was a small roller coaster in there. She was stuck between wanting to run and hide, and enjoying the attention Juice was giving her.

Juice stopped right below Nikki's belly button, and looked up her. He smiled, seeing her flushed face, and her brown hazy eyes. He trailed kisses the rest of the way down, pushing her legs open, before resting on his stomach between them. He could feel the tension in her legs, as he held them open. He kissed both of her inner thighs, "Relax, baby." He whispered.

Her breathing was heavy, and found it hard to relax. She just laid there, stiff and awkward like, until she felt it. His tongue flicked against that sensitive numb, swirling around it, sucking her clit into his mouth, and letting his teeth gently graze over it. She screamed, bucking her hips forward without even trying. She bald her fists up into the sheets, never had she ever felt something so amazing coursing through her body.

Juice took his time, preparing her, making sure she was wet enough. When he was satisfied, he stood up, removing the rest of his clothes. Nikki's eyes darted over his body, and although she was panting from the pleasure she had just received, she closed her lips tight at the sight of him naked. He was beautiful. His dick stood proudly in front of him. He was thick, that much Nikki was certain of. Her nerves jumped into her throat, along with her thoughts.

In the back of her mind she was thinking there was no way he would fit inside her, he was so big. Big to her, but maybe so were those men… no… don't think about that, not right now. She pushed the bad thoughts from her mind just as Juice crawled back on the bed, up her body, between her legs, where he settled down.

His hand caressed her face, he kissed her forehead, then her nose, then her cheek, then her other cheek, finally her lips. She smiled into the kiss, since she started to giggle before. Juice pulled away, smiling as well. And for just a moment they stayed there, silent, staring into each other's eyes, enjoying the moment of just being in each other's embrace.

"Are you sure about this?" Juice asked, running his fingers through her long curly brown hair. She bit her lip, and nodded. Juice shook his head, "Not good enough. You have to say it." He encouraged her, waiting for an answer, letting her take her time. "I'm ready, Carlos… just…" She stopped, closing her eyes, trying to compose herself and stop the tears from spilling. "Hey, hey, baby girl, don't cry, we don't have to…" Juice started, pulling himself up, off the bed. Nikki stopped him, grabbing his arm before he could get away from her. "No. Just, please go slow. Be gentle. I do want this, with you, only you."

Hearing those words made Juices heart skip a beat, and the air rush out of his lungs. He had been with so many women since he joined the MC. All those women throwing themselves at him, begging him, he have them what they wanted, he fucked them… all of them. It didn't matter time or place, he tended to their needs. But never has anyone come to him like this. Nikki _did _need him just as much as he needed her. She was asking him to make love to her, not fuck her. There was a difference, and for her, he would do anything. He leaned down and kissed her, putting all his passion and love for her into that kiss. In that moment it didn't matter who they were, where they were. It didn't matter that he helped an under aged girl escape from a mental institution, didn't matter that he had her naked in a cheap motel bed. Didn't matter that he was about to make love to her. Show her love, or share his love with her. In a sense it would be the first time for the both of them, in the very same sense that making love was a first for him. It was something that he had been so long for.

Nikki tilted her head, opening her mouth, as their tongues collided together, tasting each other, caressing each other. The same time, Juice slipped inside of her, filling her up. Nikki arched her back, pushing him more inside of her. She gasped for air. She was so full, tears filled her eyes. He was stretching her to her limits. Juice stayed as still as he could, letting her adjust to his size. He didn't move until she told him he could. Then he pulled half way out, before gently pushing back in. She let out a gasp, her arms wrapping around his neck. He rested his head in her neck as he continued to thrust into her, keeping the same slow pace. Nikki continued those soft shallow breathy moans, filling Juices ears like soft sweet music, and he encouraged every last bit of it.

Their bodies both swimming in ecstasy, they were both so close. Nikki held onto Juice as if her life depended on it. He pulled her close when he felt himself ready. They were both ready to climax, and just in time, Juice pulled her up, her legs wrapping around his waist, she was just inches above the bed, clinging to him. They came together.

Exhausted, high on love, and covered in sweat, Juice and Nikki collapsed on the bed, panting and embraced in each other's arms. "I love you." Juice said, pressing his lips to hers one last time. "I love you too." Nikki replied after they pulled apart. They fell asleep, wrapped in each other's arms, and legs tangled together. Both of them feeling complete for the first time in a long time.


	5. Chapter 5

**_Thank you guys soooo much for all this support from this fic. It means so much to me, you don't even know. And to the Guest who wrote the review for the last chapter saying this fic should be turned into a movie, seriously brought tears to my eyes. You guys are the best ever! Thank you... ALSO... there is more at the bottom... enjoy guys R&amp;R_**

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**_Chapter Five_**

The following morning, Juice woke up first, stretching as he did so. The bright sun light shone through the curtains, right into his eyes, no doubt that were the reason he woke up, he didn't mind it though. To his right, Nikki was curled up into his side, her head resting in the crook of his arm. She was so beautiful! She trusted him with herself; he knew that, she proved it to him last night. All the memories came back to him, even the smell of her sweat body filled him, mostly because that same sweat sexual sent was still there, lingering on their bodies and the sheets.

Juice turned to his side, smiling down at his sleeping girlfriend. Messy hair splayed out over his arm, some in her face, and he tenderly tucked the wild strand of hair behind her ear. She didn't even move. He knew she would be exhausted, but he didn't mind that, he was content just laying here next to her watching her sleep.

Nikki woke up half an hour later, smiling as she opened her eyes and stretched her body out. She was still swimming on cloud nine. Juice could see it on her face, and he couldn't suppress the small boyish giggle that left his lungs. In turn, Nikki smiled up at him, "What?" She questioned with a smile. Juice shook his head, "Nothing, just you." He paused, waiting for her to respond. "Me? What about me?" Nikki asked, propping herself up on her arm, as she waited for an answer. "You look so perfect. I made you look like this." Juice said, caressing her cheek. "I made you smell like this." He said again, leaning forward and smelling the skin on her neck, before placing a kiss there. "I love you."

Two days had past, and Nikki and Juice spent them naked in bed, making love. Right now, Nikki was leaning against Juice's chest. Together they sat in the bathtub, half asleep, Nikki's head rested on Juice's left shoulder, his hands wrapped around her waist.

Since Juice had come clean with everything that happened, Nikki was seriously thinking about Juice and their future together. Their money was almost gone; in fact, they only had fifteen dollars left. Which left them with two choices, move away, far away, and forget about Charming, and the club, or they could go back to the club, and see where it leads them. In the end, Juice left Nikki to decide, saying: "It's up to you, whatever you choose. You're going to have to deal with all the shit from the club, and if something should happen to me…. So it's your choice. I will stand by you and the choice you make, whatever it is." Two days later, she had come to a decision, now she was fighting with it in her mind, _is this the right choice?_

Go back to Charming and Juice might die, I might die, or we both live and we go back to a family? Go away and hide for the rest of our lives, and take the chance in the club finding us, and them killing us no matter what.

"Okay." She said, pulling Juice out of his relaxed, sleepy state.

"Okay what, baby?" He asked.

"Okay… Let's go back… to Charming."

"Really?" Juice asked, sounding half excited, half scared to death. Nikki turned around in the tub, straddling his legs. She held onto his shoulders for balance, which he didn't mind at all. "Really." She said with a nod of her head. "Why?" He asked her. It was a simple question, which had a simple answer, "For a chance."

They shared a kiss, as Nikki moved her hips, slipping Juice's member inside of her. Juice moaned out, unaware of what she was planning on doing. She sat down onto him, grinding her hips in a circular motion, causing the water from the bath tub to splash out onto the floor. She started rocking her hips back and forth; Juice's hands assisted her movements. Their moved together slowly. Their lips locked, bodies joined together. Between the two of them, they were a perfect match, age be dammed. The outlaw and the broken under aged princess, polar opposites, but maybe that's why they were so perfect.

Heavy footsteps through the room caused the couple so pause for a moment. Nikki started panicking, "What is that?" Her breathing was heavy, and her body trembled with fear. "Shhh." Juice said, shushing her. "Stay here, but put some clothes on, just be quiet. Don't leave this room until I say so, okay?" Nikki nodded, still trembling. Juice kissed the top of her head, trying his hardest to reassure her, but it didn't have the effect he was hoping for.

Juice stood up, pulling on his jeans, then pulling the door open slowly. He remembered then that his Kutte and gun were on the table in the front of the room by the window. "Shit!" He cursed between his teeth. He couldn't back down now, he had to face the music, and if he had to, he would fight. He could fight, that was one thing he was always good at. He remembers all those times the club would grapple together, it was to improve their fighting skills for when they needed them, not to mention to let off some steam whenever the air got too thick around them.

Juice looked straight into the man's eyes. His own eyes going wide, he was frozen in his place. Nikki could see Juice from the door way. His body stiff and still as a board. This couldn't be good. "Baby… who's there?" She asked, but got the silent treatment in return. He didn't even flinch at her words, which frightened her even more. Only when Nikki tried to walk forward to see who was in the room did Juice put his hand out, stopping her from taking another step.

Juice continued to stand in the doorway, eyeing the man in front of him…..

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_**Oh crap... I seemed to have left out the good parts :P Who can guess who is in the room with Juice? Three guesses each, and the guesses are... *drumroll***_


	6. Chapter 6

**_You guys are seriously the best! Reading all of your reviews makes me want to write more and more for you guys. To Alexis, thank you so much, I really glad you are enjoying this story! As for your question, all I am going to say is, your just going to have to wait and see what happens ;)_**

**_Also, I know when you guys read this, some of this isn't going to match up with the show. Thats because if I match everything up and go by the show exactly you might as well just watch the show. I'm going to use scenes from the show, turn them around, add to it, and maybe take away from it. So dont think I'm crazy if some of the stuff doesn't exactly add up._**

**_Enjoy this update and R&amp;R my lovelies! _**

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**_Chapter Six_**

This is not how he expected this to go down. He wasn't supposed to be found, especially with an under aged girl half naked in the same room with him, let alone the bathroom. It was something the MC was strictly against, doesn't matter if the girl was a day before turning eighteen, you didn't touch underage pussy, no matter what. He remembered to Elliott's daughter, and what Clay did to the guy that raped her. Why would he be any different? It would be worse for him, since he knew better. They would chop his dick off and shove it down his own throat. They would kill him, no doubt.

"Chibs, What are you doing here?" Juice asked.

"Ahh, Juicy Boy, is that any way too great a brother?"

"Sorry, I…I wasn't expecting you, that's all."

"What happened, Juicy? What's going on with you?"

"Nothing," Juice shrugged, "I just needed to get away for a while. Clear my head. I was going to head back in a few days." Juice kept a straight face, not wanting to set off any alarm bells. "How did you find me?" Juice asked, calmly, cautious.

"You forget you were here before you started prospecting? I was the one who brought you here, laddie." Chibs nodded his head, "Aye, you don't remember, do ya? You're as fucked up as you were back then, when I first found you. You don't remember any of that either, do you?" Chibs knows he's being harsh, but it's something in Juices eyes that gives it all away. He forgets that Chibs knows him better than he knows himself. He forgets that he knows this place because of Chibs. In fact, the older man was pretty much a secondary father to him, and for that reason alone, Juice chooses not to say anything.

"You were going to come back?" Chibs asked with a sigh. Chibs knows he has a soft spot for the shit head. Knows it because him and Kerrianne are just a few years a part. Knows it because Kerrianne is also half black, and he knows he would have put a bullet in anyone's mouth for messing with his only daughter about having a black mother.

Chibs had promised to protect him. Promised to look out for him the way he would his daughter, and has done so. But there was a strain in their relationship as of late, and no amount of fatherly advice he gave Juice, the boy just wouldn't open up. There was only so much he could do to help him, and it wasn't that he gave up. Juice had quite literally ran away without any explanation. Chibs deserved at least that much, even if it was just a half truth, Chibs would take it.

"I was… I am… coming back…." Juice was stumbling over his words. His nerves were starting to get the best of him, Chibs could see it.

"Why did you go? You tell me the truth Juicy. I've always had you're back, or do you think that little of me?"

It wasn't that Juice thought little of him, but it was fact that Chibs wasn't president, he couldn't protect him from the club, nor would he ask him to hide the truth from the MC. It's better this way, he doesn't need to know the truth. He doesn't need to know why.

Chibs was tired of the silent treatment, and if talking wasn't going to get it out of him, then he'd get it out of him another way.

He stalked over to him, but before Chibs got to close Juice threw his hands up, "No, wait!" Juice pleaded. He had too many secrets, and right now the roof was starting to collapse.

Chibs didn't listen; he was tired of listening, considering he wasn't getting anywhere. He continued towards Juice, smacking his hands away. That's when he noticed the quivering girl in the bathroom, half naked, except for Juices shirt covering her body. Chibs's eyes widened, "What is this?" Chibs asked, angry evident in his voice. Chibs grabbed Juice around the neck, pushing him backwards, both of them falling to the floor.

"What have you done?" Just as Chibs was about to bring his fist down to Juices face, Nikki screamed out in protest. "Stop, please… Don't hurt him!" She was crying now, hysterical and shaking. Juice looked over at her. His eyes were soft, and he silently told her everything was okay, the message never reached her.

Chibs stood up, walked back to the front of the room, shaking his head. Nikki crawled over to Juice, who was still laying on the floor. Juice held her close, as she sobbed into his chest. He whispered into her ear that it was alright, that Chibs was a good guy, and he wouldn't hurt either one of them. Now, for her sake, he hopes Chibs doesn't do anything stupid.

Juice managed to get up off the floor. Nikki terrified and still clinging to his side, and followed him towards Chibs, though she refused to look at him. "I need to tell you everything, and I need you to hear me out." Juice stated, holding his hands up in defeat. Chibs nodded towards the girl clinging to Juices side, "Aye, start with her."

"Nikki, baby, calm down, this is Chibs, from the club. Chibs, this is Nikki, my girlfriend." Nikki was a little less frantic by now, and even shook Chibs's hand. "How old are you, lass?"

Nikki looked up at Juice, almost afraid to answer, when Juice nodded his head, she answered, "Eighteen."

"She'll be eighteen in a few days." Juice said, "That's when I was going to come back."

"Jesus Christ boy!"

"Listen Chibs, it's not what it seems."

"Not what it seems?" Chibs asked, trying to keep his voice at a reasonable level, but it wasn't working so well. "Well then, do you care to explain, because right now you have a half-naked seventeen year old girl hanging on you. It's not looking very good, Juicy."

Juice sighed, "I needed to get away, clear my mind. I'm not made out to kill people, and what happened with Miles and Darvany killed me. Jax knew about my past with my dad, and he kept playing that card, he knew about Miles, knew that it was a mistake, and he used that card too. He told me if I killed Darvany for him he would forget about Miles, he'd let it go. Darvany didn't die from an overdose like he said, I killed her. I had to get away, I spent a while in CITYY to clear my head. That's where I met Nikki. I couldn't be without her, so we came out here. We were going to come back to Charming as soon as she turned eighteen, Chibs, I swear."

There was a thick silence that filled the room, it could have choked Juice out, suffocated him just like he did to Darvany, and the only one who could release the pressure was Chibs, but would he be so willing?

"So you come back and what do you think Jax is going to do when he sees you?"

"I know what he'll do. I know I'm a threat to him. He'll tell the club everything minus the truth, make it look like I killed Miles in cold blood, and killed Darvany without his say so. The club will vote mayhem and I'll be killed or worse."

Worse because living without the only family he knows would eat Juice alive. Jax and everybody else knows that. Being killed would be less painful than living without the club, it's one of the reasons why he tried to kill himself.

"Ahh, Juicy boy, what a mess this all is." No one needed to say anything else. Juice knew all to well what going back meant, but there was still that hope in the back of his mind that he would be welcomed back with open arms, and they could all move on like nothing had happened.

"When I come back, I will fix everything. I give you my word. I just need to wait until she turns eighteen."

"Ok Juice, ok. I will go back tonight. I'm going to talk to the club, let them know that I found you, and I've talked to you. I'm going to tell them you're going to come back, and when you do, they are going to listen to everything you have to say. You put it all on the table, black and white, including the shit with Jax, you tell them everything. We'll have a club vote, and I'll make sure mayhem is off the table."


	7. Chapter 7

**_Alright guys this is just a short filler chapter. Enjoy, R&amp;R!_**

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**_Chapter Seven_**

"Happy Birthday sweet heart!" Juice whispered into Nikki's ear. She was asleep, her eyes slowly fluttered open, a smile filled her face. Juice had a chocolate cupcake with a candle in the middle of it that said "18" and a small bouquet of red roses next to it, next to that was a small velvet box.

Nikki's eyes went wide, and her heart fluttered up into her throat. "What's all of this?" She asked, still smiling. She felt giddy, like she was turning sixteen again instead of eighteen.

"It's your birthday. I know it's not much, but it's what I can give you right now. I'll make it up to you later, I promise!" Juice said, sitting on the bed.

"Don't be silly, this is wonderful. I love you!" Nikki crawled over to Juice, wrapping her arms around his neck, before sharing a brief kiss. When they pulled away, Nikki bit her lip, looking into Juice's eyes, admiring them. She really did love him. He changed her world, made it better. She knew if he was willing to break her out of a mental hospital and hide away in a cheap motel room with her for a few weeks, he was a keeper. He'd do whatever he could to keep her safe and happy.

"What did you get me?" She asked, sitting next to Juice, who smiled down at her. "Well…first, here are some flowers." He said, handing her twelve red roses. She smiled, breathing them in. "They are beautiful, babe, thank you!" It was the first time she had ever received roses from a guy before.

Juice handed her the small velvet box, "Open it." He whispered. She did, and with a gasp, tears filled her eyes. "It's not much, but it's a promise to you." He was right, it wasn't much. A small silver ring on a matching chain, engraved inside it said "I promise".

"This is beautiful, Carlos." Nikki wiped away the tears forming. "Can you put it on, please?" Juice took the necklace, and eagerly put it around Nikki's neck, clasping it together.

Once Juice secured the necklace around Nikki's neck, she jumped off the bed, and ran to the bathroom, wanting to see what it looked like on herself.

Juice walked up behind her, snaking his arms around her waist. Her hands resting on his, right over her stomach, they were pressed together. She smiled; he kissed her neck, right below her ear.

"I promise to always be there for you. I promise to protect you from your fears and demons. I promise to love you. I promise to be there for you, for whatever you need. I love you baby."

Nikki turned around in his arms, smiling, and eyes full of happy tears. She reached up, cupping his face, and kissed him. He lifted her up. Her legs wrapped around his waist, and walked back to the bed. Together they fell on the bed, giggling between kisses.

Suddenly, Nikki stopped, putting her hand against Juices shoulder. He stopped too. Looking down at her with a concerned face, "What's wrong, babe?"

"I just realized…" She paused giggling again, which made Juice laugh and ask, "What?"

"I just realized that I'm eighteen now. You can legally have sex with me now." Nikki started laughing again. Juice sat up, turning his head to the side, with a smile on his face. He realized the humor in it all, but at the same time it also made him feel like a pedophile, and he wasn't that.

"Really?" He said, "What makes you think I want to have sex with an adult… you know… since I met you when you were still a kid." His voice was playful and light, so she knew he was joking.

Instead of her saying anything, Nikki leaned up, and quickly kissed him, catching him off guard. His shocked expression amused Nikki even more, making her laugh out loud. Juice joined her, only this time, he was going to get her back.

Straddling her legs so she couldn't move, he started tickling her sides, against her rib cage. She was squirming underneath him, and laughing. She tried to kick her legs, but she couldn't. All she had were her hands, and they were pretty useless at this point, because Juice was much stronger than she was. Nikki tried to push him away, but it proved to be like pushing a brick wall, he didn't budge at all.

"Tell me you love me, and I'll stop." Juice said, laughing through his request. Nikki screamed out in fits of laughter, her eyes watering, cheeks hurt from laughing, and stomach hurting from laughing, but it all felt good, it just felt right. So Nikki gathered up all her strength and screamed to the tops of her lungs as loud as she could, "I LOVE YOU JUAN CARLOS ORTIZ!" And instantly, Juice dropped his hands, and collapsed on the bed next to her. She was still giggling, coming down from that high, as she curled into Juices side, kissing him on his neck, because that's where she could reach. He rolled over onto her, "I love you too Nikki Marie Dallas." Together they made love, slowly and full of passion just the way Nikki liked, and when they were done, Nikki laid in his arms, wrapped in the sheet, and they both shared the chocolate cup cake, and spent the rest of her birthday naked and in bed, laughing and battling in epic tickle and pillow fights, which always ended in making out and sex. It was the best birthday she had ever had, spent in a cheap motel room, with the only person she loved, her other half.


	8. Chapter 8

**_Alright my lovelies, here it is! This chapter will either make or break Juice being accepted back in the club. So do your thing at the end, R&amp;R, I love to hear what you guys have to say! Also let me know what you guys think please, Am I updating too soon, every two days or so, or do you guys like my frequent updates?_**

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**_Chapter Eight_**

Vacation time was over, the following day Juice and Nikki rode back to Charming. Juices veins filled with anxiety of having to face Jax, not to mention Rat and Phil. He knows he put the two of them through hell that day Miles died. It all fell apart so fast, Juice couldn't stop it. Jax had everything going his way, if one of them had pulled the trigger, Jax wouldn't have batted an eyelash, and he'd have seen it as pay back for the missing drugs. He could provide a body, and he could wash his hands with it. Juice couldn't do that, he couldn't watch Rat and Phil sit there and hold the gun to their own head and pull the trigger, he gave them an ultimatum instead. Fifteen minutes searching for the missing drugs, the same drugs he had taken to get a sample to Eli. He would put the drugs back while everyone was looking, and there wouldn't be any questions asked.

If only Miles didn't cut through, if he wasn't such a lazy shit sometimes. If he would have just taken the long way around, Juice could have got the drugs back to the warehouse, and no one would have been hurt. But Miles didn't want to listen, and Juice didn't think he'd pull the trigger, but he did. Then he came after Juice, and he had to make a choice, live or die? He chose to live, and Miles got in the way. There isn't a day that goes by that he doesn't think about him. He apologizes every day, talks to him.

It's only when Nikki tightens her grip around his waist from behind him that he is suddenly made aware that they have pulled up to Teller Morrow. He can tell Nikki is nervous, how couldn't she be? This life, in the club, it wasn't something she knew about. All she knew was green grass and white picket fences, beautiful brick houses, family BBQ's on the weekends, while all the neighborhood kids play in the pool.

Juice warned her though. He told her everything that he has done, everything the club has done. It took her some time, but in the end she told him that maybe the violence that erupted in her family was just a stepping stone to get her to her new life with him.

He didn't want her to feel like that. He wanted her to feel safe with him, and ironically, despite all the shit he had told her, she had never felt safer. She told him she wouldn't leave him. She was going to be there for him no matter what. She would back him up, as long as he did the same for her. The ring on the chain was a physical promise, something she can see and feel and hold onto, literally giving her his word, which she wore next to her heart.

Nikki was the first to get off the bike as soon as Juice parked. His bike lined up with the rest of them, all neat in a row just like always. She handed him her helmet, and he put it away.

For a minute Juice just stood there, looking up at what he used to call home, what is still his home, but just seems like a distant memory now. There was a good chance that he wouldn't be welcomed back to SAMCRO. He wasn't ready for that. The MC was the only life he knew, and they were his family. Now he had just one more responsibility, he had Nikki. And if protecting her, and caring for her meant leave SAMCRO, He would have to do it.

"You alright, babe?" Nikki asked rubbing her hand up and down his back for encouragement.

"I have to be." Juice replied with a weak smile.

Hand in hand, they both walked up to the doors of the

twitchy like he always gets, but he wasn't going to back down, not today. Today was a day of reckoning auto repair shop, where he was met by Chibs.

"Juicy Boy!" Chibs loud gruff voice screeched out. It's how he welcomes everyone back, with his arms wide open. Juice found it more welcoming that he should have, but he'd take it anyway. "It's good you came back Juicy. Don't worry about anything, alright, lad? I've talked to the boys, it'll be alright." It wasn't until then that Juice felt the pre storm surge in his stomach. His anxiety had suddenly stormed through the roof. He wanted to get back on that bike, take his girl, and get the fuck out of dodge. But he wasn't the type of person to run away, he faced it head on.

With a supporting arm thrown around his shoulder, and the tender loving hand of his girlfriend in his hand, he had enough strength to walk in that club house again, and face his demons head on.

Nikki stayed outside, breathing in the fresh air. She didn't want to go in, she didn't want to see what the club was about, mainly because she wasn't ready. She was simply there for support, and she doubted she could be supportive if she saw the rows and rows of jail house pictures that adorned the wall, Juan Carlos "Juice" Ortiz included in the mural of pictures. Not to mention the skanks around the bar, or hanging on some of the men. She wasn't one of them, not by a long shot. Nikki was from a different world, brought up in a different life, with a loving family. She didn't know pain, not until her family was taken. She wanted to stay just a little bit pure, until things were settled more.

Juice took his seat at the Reaper, nervous and, he'd look the reaper in the eye and spit if he had to. Do the same to Jax if that's what needed to be done. For a moment if felt like old times, quiet, everyone around the table. The eye of the storm was smack dab in the middle of that table, it was calm, but moving quickly, and knowing that, as it passed by with its ugly teeth showing, it would rip its way through that room and leave everyone with ugly scares and bleeding hearts thrown on that fucking table, pulled right out of their chest, right in front of them.

"Glad you could make it, Juice." Venom leaking from his fangs, Juice could see it dripping. Because what he didn't know was, if he didn't make it, Mayhem would be the next step. If Juice had failed to show, it would prove that he was a coward, prove that he was in the wrong, and Jax was in the right, Juice would have been dead by the end of the night, most likely with Nikki by his side.

Juice doesn't respond, instead, with a slight nod of his head, and a smirk on his face, he waits to hear what else Jax has to say.

Jax takes the hint, and continues, "Chibs informed me that you were willing to come back, and tell the club why you left, why you ran away. I agreed there would be no mayhem vote against you, however, the rest of the guys don't know what I know. I can't promise your safety from them. The table is yours, it's time to come clean Juice, we'll have a vote at the end, stay or go." With that Jax fell silent, giving the table over to Juice.

Juice's mouth went dry, his palms were sweaty, and his brain was screaming at him to get the fuck out of there. Despite his nerves running on high, he stayed firm in his seat, making sure to look every single club member in the eye before talking. It was his own personal way of showing everyone he would take whatever would be dished out at the end of all of this.

All eyes were on him: Jax, Bobby, Chibs, Happy, Tig, Phil and Rat, and Juice was the center piece for all of them, waiting to hear what he had to say, if he would own up to what had happened, or if he would put it off on someone elses hands like he did with Miles.

Miles… That's where he started. True to his word, he owned up to everything, filled the club in on what went down that day. How every day after that seemed to be a downward spiral, a constant roller coaster that he couldn't get off of.

The guys listened quietly, giving Juice his time to speak. It wasn't until Jax name came up when he was explaining what happened with Darvany, and her death. How Jax used Juice to do his dirty work to buy back into the club, but never letting it go like he promised. There was always another dirty job to be done to keep Jax's hands clean. Juice followed every single order Jax threw his way, He was a good lap dog that way, true to his owner, or in this case the MC's president, followed through with every dirty command, right or wrong, never asked questions, but truly believed that every time would be the last time, which never was.

When it came time to give Jax up to the club, he did so, hesitant, but willing. He was tired, oh so tired, of being Jax's puppet. He was always pulling the strings, but never cut them loose, even when the puppet started to break, piece by fragile piece, and the strings began to knot together, Jax still did whatever he could to keep pulling those strings. No those same strings were so knotted up and the puppet was so broken he no longer cared what happened to the guy pulling them. This was his personal way of cutting himself free of those knotted and mangled strings.

After Juice spoke the truth about Darvany's death and the role him and Jax played in it, and how it was Jax's way of allowing Juice back in the club with no mayhem for killing a brother. The entire room fell deafly silent.

Juices chest felt the weight of that silence sitting on top of him, looking down and laughing in his face. Bobby and especially Chibs, looking over to Jax, sitting at the Gavel, his jaw clenched together, eyebrows furrowed. He was clearly pissed off. Juice was never supposed to spill the dirty laundry, but he couldn't keep it inside anymore. He was literally buckling under the weight of it all.

The club was never supposed to be this difficult. Chibs had recruited Juice because he was a computer geek, and had a knack for photography. The little shit was talented. He kept the systems up to date, kept the "non-working" cameras in order, and if there was anything special needed in between, they needed photos or proof of something, Juice was their undercover cat. He had light work load, because that's all his tender frame could carry. He was never supposed to be involved with the kills, sure he knew how to work the gun, and didn't mind carrying one, that's what happens when you join the MC, you carry and your prepared to use it, but never murder, it was always self defense, and Jax happened to exploit that one tiny issue.

Juice had tried to make it right with Miles, was willing to take his own life, hand himself the mayhem he deserved, he was ready for it.

"We need to think about this. We need to talk about this." Bobby said.

Juice instantly stood up to leave, before Chibs spoke. "Jax, you too. Rat go with them, make sure nothing goes down." Rat did with a nod, following Juice out, Jax right behind him. Juice didn't look back, didn't acknowledge Jax, wouldn't give him the time of day. He's had enough, Jax has taken enough, and Juice was done with that.

Juice went outside, where Nikki was sitting at a table, her knee bouncing up and down. It had been something she always did when her nerves were on over drive. As soon as she saw Juice, she stood up, eyes filled with worry. "What happened, baby?" She asked, falling into his arms. He pulled her close, kissing her forehead. "Don't worry babe, everything will be fine. The worst they can do is strip my patch."

Just then Jax's face popped out of the door, before stepping outside, lighting up a cigarette. He stared Juice down. Nikki instantly felt uncomfortable, and automatically knew who the blond haired man was, "That's Jax isn't it?" She asked. Juice nodded and answered back with a faint, "Yeah." He kept her in his arms, and held her close to him.

"Can I speak to you for a moment?" Jax suddenly said. Juice tilted his head, looking concerned, but didn't say anything.

"No man, you have to wait for the guys…"

"Shut up Rat. Go back inside." Jax shouted.

"You know I can't do that, Chibs said…"

"I know what Chibs said, but Chibs isn't the president, is he? Remember your place, Prospect, now go inside."

"It's ok Rat." Juice said, nodding towards the door to the club house. Rat shot Juice a look of concern, one that clearly said _If you were smart you wouldn't be doing this. _And maybe that is just the way it is, maybe Juice isn't so smart after all.

Juice turned to Nikki, kissed her and said, "Stay here with Rat. I'll be right back." Before following Jax to the side of the building, Juices stomach lurched into his throat. He knew what was coming his way.

Jax stood up straight, legs shoulder width apart, "You betrayed me."

Juice stood in front of him, trying desperately to keep a straight face, but he was never good at that. His eyes filled with tears, because still, in some sick twisted way, he was still somebody's puppet, and he was betraying someone, he had ratted Jax out to the club. Now Juice would have to hold the weight of the clubs decision, whatever that decision would be, would stain Juices hands.

"I'm sorry Jax. You know I was never cut out for this. I never wanted to hurt the club. I never wanted to betray anyone. I never wanted to kill anyone, but I was ready. I never meant to kill Miles, and I was more than ready to deal with that problem. You gave me an out. You made me take another life. Kill a woman to prove my loyalty to the club." Juice looked away, with a crooked smirk on his face, "We never kill women or kids. We also never take mayhem into our own hands after a vote was passed denying mayhem." Juice paused, "You're not as innocent as you think you are Jax. Remember what you did to Clay? So don't stand there and try to make me out to be the bad guy, because I'm not. I'm here, and I own up to all the shit I've done, which is more than what you have done. You just hand off your dirty work to everyone around you." With that said, Jax nodded his head, his face distorted into disgust. His arm cocked back, and then lurched forward, connecting with Juices face. Juice stumbled, lost his balance, and fell to the floor. Shaking his head, Juice got back up, and stood toe to toe with Jax, who punched him again, this time busting his lip. Juice was on the ground, and this time Jax didn't wait for Juice to get up this time, instead, Jax stood over him, his fist repeatedly connecting with Juices face.

It wasn't until a rush of booted footsteps running towards them that the rest of the club saw what was happening. Bobby made the simplest verbal response to the scene in front of him, "Holy shit!"

It took Chibs and Happy to pull Jax off of Juice.

"What the hell is going on?" Bobby asked, pushing Jax up against the wall.

"Nothing man." Jax said.

Chibs helped Juice up off the ground, supporting most of his weight. Juices head rolled to the side, he was half conscious.

Sometime during the scuffle Nikki had ran to see what the commotion was. Nikki was screaming and crying. Watching the blood seep from her boyfriend's face only brought her back in time, and she began to question how Juice had even got involved in a gang with such violent out bursts.

Chibs took Juice into the club house, where he sat him down to clean up his face. Nikki followed right behind them, sniffling and crying as she did so.

"I'm sorry Chibs." Juice whispered.

"Hey…" Chibs said, firm but gentle, just like his hand placed at the nap of Juices neck, "It's alright boy. We'll figure all this out."

"I never wanted any of this to happen." Juice said, tears rolling down his face.

"I know Juicy boy, I know."


	9. Chapter 9

**_Alright my luffs, here is a much longer chapter Nine. Just a few points, remember in the first few chapters it was going back and forth between past and present time? So far this story line that I am on right now with Juice making it back to the MC and everything that is happening with Nikki is all leading back up to the "present day" So the next chapter will contain that. Just so no one gets too confused. Like always you guys know what to do, R&amp;R, let me know your thoughts. Do you think Juice will go back to the MC? If so do you think Nikki will support him? If not, what might the plan be?_**

**_Also tomorrow is my birthday, and my boyfriend is going to be spending the weekend here with me, so I probably wont be updating for a few days. So until then, XOXO!_**

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**_Chapter Nine_**

Cuts and bruises eventually fade, and some people will sport the scars on their skin proudly. For Juice those scars, cuts and bruises were part of his life. They were battle wounds with stories to match. He knew what would happen to him when he followed Jax around the corner. He knew because it's not the first time hes done it. Jax has a secret that life, he wears two faces, one for his club and one for his enemies, which walked a fine line together.

Nikki was left to pick up the broken and chipped off pieces that fell off of Juice, and she did so happily. She would do her best to glue him back together, because he did the same for her when she was broken.

There was only one place that could sooth their souls. Nikki pleaded the small request into Juices ear after Chibs patched him up, he nodded, took her hand. And when Chibs asked, "Where ya off to, lad," all Juice responded was, "Be back in a few hours, that'll give you and the club plenty of time to decide. I'll come back when the votes in. I have my cell." And with that, Juice took Nikki, and walked out of the gates of Teller Morrow, and didn't look back. It was a sign of a man who had enough of club bull shit. Chibs sighed, and watched the two love birds on the bike, as they flew down the street.

Juice parked his bike, and held Nikki's hand as she got off. Neither one of them saying a word, it was a shared silence, letting everything that had just gone down, allowing all of it to sink in. For Nikki it would take longer, she wasn't used to the everyday violence that occurred with the club, Juice had been so used to it, that it practically numbed his skin. He didn't pretend to not notice the concerned glances she gave him, knowing how many questions must be floating around that pretty little head of hers. She would spill them once she settled down, Juice knew that for sure, she always did.

Their tree, their sanctuary, their small tiny island oasis in the middle of hell on earth, the willow tree was just that. Juice was the first to lie down, head propped up against the uncomfortable branch that uprooted itself from the ground. He remembered learning about that kind of stuff in science class as a kid. The teacher telling him something about when the tree is in search for water, after so long the roots pull themselves up to the service, literally uprooting themselves in search of a direct water source. However thirsty this tree was, it was still beautiful and full. Full branches of leaves that dangled down, touching the floor. Inside the leaves acted like a curtain, surrounding them, and closing them off from the world. Inside of their curtain tree, time stopped, and nothing mattered.

Nikki lay down, pressing her body into Juices side. His arm wrapped around her shoulders, pulling her closer to him. She laid her head down on his chest, and just like that, stayed together, quiet, blissful, at peace.

Nikki tried to calm her thoughts, tried to make sense of them, but they were too muddled up, and they were all asking questions and talking at the exact same time. She wanted to scream for all those little tiny voices in her head to shut up, but she wasn't that far gone. Instead, she closed her eyes, and mentally pleaded for them to speak one at a time so she could understand them better, and slowly, they quieted down, and she was able to sort them out.

"You knew Jax would hit you, didn't you? Because that's how he is, right? You said it before."

"Yeah."

"So why did you agree to "_talk"_ with him?" She said the word with venom, and disgust.

"I knew what he was going to do. Call me stupid or whatever, but I did it to prove something today, and I think Bobby and Chibs got the message, clear as day. If the MC is going to run smoothly, someone with a level head needs to be president. Jax Teller has done a lot for SAMCRO, and no matter what, he will always bleed for the club, he was born into that life, he is the club, but that doesn't mean that at some point he wont be bad for it. That point just happened to happen sooner than later. Guess the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree after all." Because it was Gemma who twisted his son into what he is, and it was Clay who helped her wind him that way. Jax lost it a long time ago, and first took all his aggression out on Clay for the shit he did, but now he's turning into the same man he put down.

"So you're hopping they kick Jax out of the club?" Nikki spoke about the club and asked questions like an innocent child. She didn't know any of the lingo they used, or what entailed the "_kicking out_" part. She was learning as she went, and Juice was more than happy and patient to teach her along the way.

"In an ideal world, Jax would be stripped of his patch, maybe even kicked from the club." And dare he say it, meet Mr. Mayhem, because god only knows the man deserves it. Juice just wasn't the type of guy to want that for a member, or anyone at all, unless they deserved it. Jax did deserve it, but for Juice to verbalize his want for such violence towards a member, a brother, only twisted the knife in his gut even more, the same knife Jax stabbed him with.

"I love you Nikki, and I love the club. I love the guys too…. And in some sick twisted way, I still love Jax, despite what he has done, but I'm tired of being beat up, and I'm tired of taking his shit. I'm done. Reguardless of what the club votes, you decide what we do. You say the word and I'll leave this life behind for you. You say the word and I'll take you wherever you want to go, we can start over somewhere else, or we can stay here. I can try to work it out with the MC, we're earning straight. If they vote Jax out, things will be ok. It's up to you, your call either way."

"I just don't want to see you get hurt anymore. If you think the MC is going to be good for you, for us, then stay. I would never ask you to leave something you love. My life is with you now, you are my family. I don't have a home unless it's with you. Either way, I will support you. You do what you think is going to be best for the both of us."

Juice smiled, that's why he loved this girl so much. She was never selfish or greedy; she looked at the bigger picture and no matter what she always supported him. She is a good old lady, and he would spend the rest of the time they had together showing her that.

When Juices phone finally rang, and Chibs gruff Scottish voice filled the phone with, "Votes in, you coming back now, lad?" Juice smirked a knowing smirk, he could read Chibs voice, he already knew what the vote was. "Be right there." He hung up the phone, and sighed content, shoving the phone back into his pocket.

"What happened?" Nikki asked.

Juice looked over at her and smiled, so when he didn't say anything, she was prompted to ask again, "What?" Only this time a smile erupted on her face, because maybe she knew everything was going to be ok.

Juice rolled over, pinning Nikki beneath him. She let out a giggly squeak, as her arms wrapped around Juices waist. "I want to fuck you right here, under this tree, and make you scream my name for the whole world to hear." Juice said, looking directly into Nikki's eyes.

Her face grew hot, and her eyes bright. She was brought up in traditional ways of life, where sex was only done as an act of love, and in the privacy of your bedroom once you were married. "What?" She shrieked, "Here? Outside where people can see and here us?"

"No one is going to see you, I won't let them, your mine, only I can see you." Juice leaned down, capturing her lips in his, and he felt her relax a bit. "Not to mention we are surrounded by the tree, no one will see us, there isn't really anyone here anyway." Again he brought his lips down to hers. He was right, there wasn't anyone really there, except for the occasional mother jogging, and pushing a stroller, men walking their dogs. Children were in school, and most of the adults were at work, so the park was pretty much empty. The few people that were there were wrapped up in other things, they wouldn't even notice the two of them fucking under the tree.

Juice reached down between Nikki's legs, rubbing his fingers in a circular motion over Nikki's clit. She moaned, into the kiss, and with that, he knew it was ok. He quickly removed her shorts, and panties, and then unzipped his pants. Nikki pushed them down just enough to pull his cock out, and just like that, he slips inside her. Fills her up, makes her eyes see stars, as she is pushed into the sweetest oblivion. His face is buried in her neck, placing soft kisses and nibbles along her collar bone. Her eyes have the perfect view of swaying vines and blue sky. She is moaning softly into his head, calling his name, begging him. Her body is on fire, but so is his, and together they climax.

It doesn't last long, and that's not a bad thing, because Juice has somewhere to be, should already have left. But he needed this moment, to officially mark this place their own, their private oasis.

Nikki sighs, as her body comes down from the sexual high. Juice does the same, resting his head on her chest, still inside of her, neither one of them wants to move. They are both alright with that, because his still being inside of her afterward gives her another high in itself. It grounds her, and lets her know that she is everything to him, that she isn't just some quick fuck for him whenever he needs it. He loves her, and she loves him, and being joined together, causing each other such pleasure, and coming down from that together, is more than she could ask for.

Eventually Juice does pull out with a sloppy pop sound, Nikki moans again. She misses him already. She is his lock and he is her key, they fit together perfectly. Juice stands up, pulls his pants up and buckles his belt. Nikki is still lying there, half naked, and she doesn't seem to care, because he promised her no one would see her. Regardless if they were outside or inside, she takes his word for it, and leaves her body open and exposed. She is still dripping from his cum inside of her, which leaves her feeling wet and sticky.

Juice smiles down at her, she looks so beautiful in this moment. So beautiful and vulnerable at the same time, and its then that Juice tells her to put her clothes back on, and she does so with his help.

By the time they reach the club house, Chibs and Happy are sitting outside as if they were already waiting for Juice to come back.

Juice walked up to Chibs, who pulled him into a brotherly hug. When the two parted, there was one new thing Juice noticed, Chibs's Kutte no longer held the Sgt. At Arms patch, but the President's patch.

"What happened to Jax?" Juice questioned.

"The club listened to what you had to say, if they weren't convinced by you, they sure as hell was after Jax attacked you. The club voted for a new president."

"What about Bobby?"

"Bobby didn't want it, said that patch turns people into something they aren't, and maybe he's right."

"You'll be a good prez, brother." Juice left it at that, but still lingering in the air was one more unanswered and unasked question. "Where do I stand with SAMCRO?" Chibs smiled, wrapped his arm around Juices shoulders and said, "Exactly where you belong. No more shit Juicy Boy. You do what you were brought into the club to do, ok lad?"

Juice felt tears sting his eyes, he was more than relieved. "The guys are ok with me coming back?" Juice had to be just a little timid, Chibs knows this, nor he wouldn't expect anything less from the kid, especially after all the shit Jax dragged him through.

"Do you really think you'd be standing here right now asking me that question if the club wasn't ok with it Juicy?" That was all Juice needed to hear, and just like that he was accepted back with open arms and pats to his back. Everything was going to be ok, everything would fall back into place, and Juice would resume his role as the technical guy for the club, just like he was before the shit hit the fan.


	10. Chapter 10

**_Hi guys, Did you miss me? _**

**_Thank you for the birthday wishes! I had a great time!_**

**_Just finished this chapter. I could have gone on and on and on with it, but I thought I better stop somewhere, next chapter will be FULL of drama! Read it and Review it my lovelies! :)_**

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**_Chapter Ten_**

It's different, sitting at the table and seeing Chibs face at the Gavel instead of Jax's, something to get used to, definitely. It's a welcome change, and it's almost as if the whole entire room had a makeover. There was still a stain that couldn't be dealt with, or at least, no one was paying any attention to it, but for Juice and that fucking OCD mind of his, he could see it. The damn thing was practically screaming in his face, scratching his skin, and peeling his flesh wide open.

Jax teller, sitting at the opposite end of the table, wore an angry, stone like face. He was constantly scowling, glancing between Chibs and Juice. For Juice, it was unsettling, and every time he would bring it up with Chibs on the down low, Chibs would send him off with a pat on his back, and tell him, "Aye." With a nod of his head, "There is nothing I can do about it, unless he steps out of line, Juicy."

So Juice was a sitting duck, because SAMCRO be dammed if he didn't know retaliation was spewing in Jax Tellers head every time he looked his way. He wouldn't be dumb enough to believe that everything was just peachy now that they had a new president. Because shit didn't work that way, not even in a perfect world, and perfect was far from what they were living in.

Juice accepted his face, whatever it may be, and took it with a grain of salt, knowing that Jax Teller would most likely come to him, beat him senseless or worse. Juice took it upon himself to keep Jax within eye sight at all times. And when he was at home, when it was just him and Nikki, he made sure to keep his gun by his side at all time, even sleeping with the damn thing next to him. Every little noise or peep, Juice would bolt out of bed check the house, inside and out, ready to pull the trigger, and bring an end to Jackson Teller, because that's what needs to happen.

It wasn't until one day while Nikki was in the kitchen trying her hand at making pancakes and eggs, while Juice was in the shower. They were living together, in Juices house, despite the extremely sterile environment, she was enjoying herself. She had even warned him that she was going to add a few feminine touches, because that's what the places needed. One afternoon after coming home from a run, he found Nikki in old tattered clothes, his beautiful white walls tapped off, and paper lining the floors, a paint brush roller in one hand and several cans of brightly colored paint behind her. Juice was just finishing with his shower, stepping out and wrapping a towel around his hips when he heard Nikki scream from the kitchen. Juice just about had a heart attack, grabbed his gun that was resting on the toilet lid, and ran into the kitchen gun pointed for whatever or whoever was intruding. There was no one there, just a hot pancake that landed on the floor too close to Nikki's toes for comfort. The sudden move on Juices part startled Nikki, made her scream again, and practically fall to the floor.

"What the hell are you doing?" Nikki asked, pitch high, as she eyed the gun in Juices hand. Juice dropped the gun, and was instantly at Nikki's side. "Baby, I'm so sorry, I thought Ja… someone broke in."

"What? No, why would you think that? I dropped a pancake, and it burned my toe." Nikki was the first to crack a smile, laughing at how ridiculous the whole situation had sounded coming out of her mouth. Juice looked her over once, twice, not really getting the humor in all of it, until he looked down at Nikki's toe which was bright red, and the pancake that lay next to it. Juice cracked a smile, and even threw his head back in laughter, both of them on the floor, gun and pancake included.

After the laughter died down, Nikki served up the eggs, pancakes, toast, and orange juice. The two sat quietly, giving each other loving glances, and eating their food. Half way through her meal, Nikki dropped her fork, and clutched her stomach. Juice took notice, "Hey baby, you okay?" Juice asked, concern crossing his face. Nikki nodded, "Yeah, I just…" She paused, taking a slow deep breath before letting it back out, "I just felt a little…" Before she could finish sentence, Nikki jumped out of her seat, and ran to the bathroom. She fell to her knees in front of the toilet, where she empty the contents of her stomach.

Juice followed right behind her, holding her hair back, and patting her back. When she was done, she leaned back against Juices knees. Juice cupped her face, his thumb running across her cheeks, upside down, since he was standing and she was sitting. She was pale, and felt clammy under his hand. "You don't look so good, babe."

"I don't feel so good. Maybe it was the food."

"Maybe, but I don't feel sick."

"Maybe I just caught something from somewhere."

"Let's get you in bed."

Juice reached down, one arm supporting Nikki's back, the other scooped up her legs. He carried her bridal style down the hallway and to their bedroom, before placing her in bed, and covering her up. With a kiss to her forehead, Nikki instantly fell asleep.

Juice was left to take care of the breakfast, looking down at the half eaten plate of food between them; Juice shrugged his shoulders, piled everything into one plate, and finished the food.

The pre-paid rang, and with a mouth full of food Juice answered with a, "Lo?"

"Juicey?" Came Chibs voice.

"Mhm." Juice answered back, mouth still full.

"Were waiting on you Juicy Boy, everything ok?" Chibs asked. Juice swallowed his food before answering. "Sorry dude. Nikki is really sick, I don't think I'll be able to make it in today."

"We need you Juicy. We've got some shit going down at Diosa."

"Shit. What happened?"

"Can't say over the phone, I'll stop by and fill you in. We need your expertise Juicy."

After that they hung up, Juice decided to put some clothes on and wait for Chibs, and whoever else was planning on showing up at his house.

Juice was in the bed room, checking on Nikki, who was curled up on her side, hair splayed out over her face and pillow, she was less pale then she was earlier, but still not looking good. His fingers grazed gently across her cheek, slowly pulling her hair back, and tucking it behind her ear. She didn't move an inch. Juice smiled to himself, and mentally hoped Nikki would be alright soon.

Chibs, Bobby, Tig and Happy gathered in Juices living room. Everyone taking a seat either on the black leather couch Juice sat across from them in the matching chair. It felt good, official, that the guys came to him for his "expertise" is what Chibs said. That was something that Juice had no problem with, Chibs didn't ask him to kill anyone, at least not yet. They all sat around facing each other, before Chibs finally started speaking.

"Someone has been sneaking into Diosa and leaving threatening messages to some of the girls. We were also informed that there is no security set up; they have nothing to protect them. Are you interested Juicy?"

Juice didn't even have to think about it, he could have a security set up placed and running in just a few hours. "Hell yeah I'm interested. I'm your guy for that kind of shit." And there it was: Juices smile, the one that could stop the world from spinning. Chibs hadn't seen that wide boyish smile in so long, he felt good seeing it again.

It had been a good hour since Nikki had fallen asleep, and now with distant laughter ringing in her ear, her eyes fluttered open. She took a deep breath anticipating instant nausea, but surprisingly, it was gone. She sat up slowly, and when she still felt fine, she stood up, and made her way into the living room where the talking and laughing was coming from.

Nikki had always been a timid person. It took her awhile to warm up to people; however with Juice the connection was instant. Now with a group of strange men in her living room, she found herself peeking around the corner and staying hidden, but listening to the conversation. She caught something about someone named Nero and Gemma, and how they were on again off again, and how Jax and Tara seemed to be falling apart. She decided to just walk straight into the kitchen for some water, and let the guys be.

Juice caught her instead, "Hey baby, how are you feeling?" He asked getting up from the chair he was sitting in to wrap his arm around Nikki's waist, and plant a tender kiss on her temple.

"Sorry, I didn't want to disturb you…"

"Don't be sorry. Come sit down, I'll introduce you to the guys."

"No no, I just wanted to get some water."

"Well, come sit down after. You should meet them anyway."

Nikki took her time getting some water, she wasn't thrilled to be meeting a bunch of bikers, and it wasn't because they were his friends. It was simply because she knew the violence that was included in the club, she also knew that even though Juice had taken peoples lives, he had regretted it terribly, he showed remorse. She remembered hearing stories about Happy who enjoyed the kill, and Tig who was just a box of confusion all on his own, who in their right mind would have sex with a corpse? Tig would. As for Chibs, she recalled how fondly Juice would talk about him, even saying how the Scot was the only father figure that has stayed in his life this long. It was one of the reasons Juice wanted to come back to the club, he needs that father.

Nikki made her way into the living room, she kept her head down, and sat on Juices lap. Through introduction, she forced a smile on her face, Chibs was the one with the scars, Happy was the one that looked angry, Tig was the one with the curly hair, and bobby was the hairy fat one.

"She's real cute, Juicy." Tig chipped in.

"Don't even think about Tiggie. She's mine." Juice said with a laugh, and ran his fingers up and down Nikki's arm. She had tensed up at the sudden change in topic, now they group was focused on her. It left her with an unsettling feeling, and it wasn't pleasant sitting in the pit of her stomach. She was uncomfortable around these strange men, and wanted to run and hide in her room until they left. She also found herself questioning how the hell did Juice get into all this? How could he call these men his family? None of it made any sense.

"So babe, remember how I told you I was the Tech guy for the club, well they have a job for me to do. I need to get it done today, and I can have it done in a couple hours. Do you want to tag a long, meet some of the girls?"

Chibs sat diagonally across, on the couch. The question had smacked him in the face. Was this kid really dense? "You think that's a good idea Juicy?" Chibs asked. Juice looked up, looked him straight in the eye, "No secrets man, she needs to know what I'm in for, and what that entails." Chibs nodded, he gave the kid credit. Let the girl see for herself and let her make the choice of whether she should stay or go. Could she support Juice, or take offense and leave?

"Is it dangerous?" Nikki asked.

"In what sense of the word?" Tig asked, his voice light with humor as he rubbed the corner of his eye. Juice just laughed, "No, it's not dangerous. I just want you to know what we do now."

She looked into his eyes, trusting them to tell her the truth. She nodded her head, believing they would. "Okay, Let me go shower, and we'll go."


	11. Chapter 11

**_Hey guys, how is everybody? So I have just a few things to say before you start reading. First, I have only one more chapter left for this story, but dont worry, because this isn't the end for Juice and Nikki. I have decided to turn this into a series, and I have already started on the second story. It is called In The Butterflies Nest.  Second, I am also working on a slash fic between Juice and Chibs, but before I put it out there, I just want to know how many would be interested in actually reading it, so at the end I will have a few lines from that story and just let me know what you think about it. _**

**_And now, here you go. Hope you all enjoy it, R&amp;R! _**

* * *

**_Chapter Eleven_**

Juice mounted the last camera in the corner at the top of the stairs. The angle the camera was pointed over saw the entire hallway including the staircase. Juice climbed down from the ladder, a smile on his face, "All I need to do now is make sure they are all synced up to the computer and everything should be set. " Nero nodded, "Okay, thank you."

Meanwhile, Nikki sat on oversized couched which curved from one wall to the other, curving at the corner. It was comfortable, despite its magazine type look, she felt comfortable and relaxed against the velvety fabric. She wasn't the most comfortable, watching the girls prance around in their skimpy lingerie. She couldn't wait to go home. Her head was filled with half naked women, and her boyfriend, working with half naked women. What did he see in her? She looked nothing like these women, why would he want her when he could get any one of these girls? She wasn't sexy or cute like these girls, she didn't put on lingerie and prance around in her bra and panties, she didn't have big boobs, or a bubble butt, she didn't have curvy hips, she was just average. On a good day she couldn't even pull off a decent make up and hair style. What the hell did Juice see in her, why was he still with her?

By the time Juice was finished, he lightly touched Nikki on the arm, "Ready to go babe?"

"Huh? Oh… yeah, let's go." She was the first to walk out of Diosa, head down and quick steps. A wave of emotions ran through her body, tears spilled over her cheeks and she couldn't understand why.

"I don't think she's too happy with your choice of business, Juicy boy." Chibs said, clapping Juice on the shoulder.

"Yeah, I got that." Juice said, slipping in sunglasses on and his leather gloves before walking out.

He found Nikki sitting on his Harley, her shoulders were slouched forward, and her head was down. Juice cupped her face, forcing her to look up at him, it was only then he noticed her tears, and bent down to his knees. "Whats wrong, babe? Did one of the girls say something? I swear if…"

"No, no one said anything to me, everyone was really nice."

"What's wrong then? Are you feeling sick again?" Juice asked, the concern in his voice was overwhelming.

"No, I'm fine, but why are you with me?"

"What? Baby, I love you, you are my girl. Where is this coming from?"

"All those beautiful women with big boobs and full butts and plump lips and they are all beautiful and have so much sex appeal, and look at me, look at you." Nikki sniffled, "You are so hot, Carlos, you can get any girl you want, and your with me." Her voice hit a high pitch at the end, and she ended up hiccupping between words. Juice looked down, a smile spread across his face as he stood up, pulling Nikki with him. Once again, he forced her to look up at him, tears staining her cheeks, nose running, and lower lip quivering between tears. "You are right silly girl, you are nothing like those girls." With those words, Nikki's tears sped up, Juice smiled again, pulling her close to him. His lips captured hers, as he leaned down into her. His body pressed against hers, as he held her close. There was so much emotion and passion in that kiss, and Nikki let out a small squeak, she was losing her breath, and needed to breathe. Juice didn't give in though, not even when he felt Nikki's nails digging into his arms and neck, if anything he pushed his lips against hers even more.

Seconds later Juice finally pulled away. Nikki stood there, wobbly on her feet, head spinning, and completely out of breath. "Wow!" She said.

"Don't you ever think I don't love or care for you, or that I deserve someone else, because no one can give me what you give me. No you're not like those girls, you don't run around naked, having sex with whatever man looks your way, or woman for that matter, you are committed to me, you proved that. I love you Nikki, you are mine, and even though your body isn't perfect, and your boobs are plastic, and your butt is small, I don't care, I love you for who you are, not what you look like, which by the way, is a damn sexy beautiful lady." Juice said, kissing her cheek.

* * *

Jax watched Juice embrace the young girl, his lip curled up in disgust. Juice was nothing but a traitor and a rat. Why was he so important, when did that happen? The club was built on the Teller name, and now the only Teller that could take control was voted down in rank. It pissed him off, made his blood run cold. It was all Juices fault, and now he had to pay. In fact, if he wasn't going to run the table, then the end of the club was near, he could feel it in his veins, and if that happened, Jax would make sure Juice would die with it.

Pulling out his phone with one last puff of his cigarette, Jax dialed in the number. It only took a few rings before he heard his voice, "Hello?"

"It's Jax Teller, I need a favor."

* * *

**_As promised here is the new fic I'm working on. I do not have a title for the story yet, so let me know, any suggestions, credit will go to you, I might even put a poll up. _**

**_So in this fic, it's going to be a little complicated. The pairings are Juice/ Kerrianne, Juice/Chibs, Half Sack/Cherry. There might be more later, but those will be the main couples. Let me know what you guys think!_**

And when I looked at him for the first time with clear eyes, I knew….

I couldn't face him, not like this, not with me high as a fucking kite when I feel like I own the damn universe, no, it would kill me.

I wasn't always this fucked up. I wasn't always a junkie. I was a good kid, street smart, knew who and what to avoid. I was a good person with aspirations, ha ha! What the fuck does that even mean anymore? I couldn't tell you, before I could though, before all this happened, before I lost who I was. I was a good kid, with my head on my shoulders, a love for fast cars and motorcycles, and beautiful women. I also had a natural talent for all things computers. My only flaw back then… I had a little OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) everything had to have a place. Food in the fridge would be lined up and color coordinated. Can's in the cupboard would be stacked nice and neatly, always with the label facing forward. I couldn't help it, I had been that way since I was a kid. It was my way of keeping life even and straight when there was too much bad around me.

I grew up in a shitty neighborhood, where gun blasts were everyday background noise. My sister took care of me while my mom worked, our dad was out of the picture, in fact I didn't even know him except for the fact he was black. My birth certificate said I was Puerto Rican, I didn't even look black, and that's what I lived by. So when life pulled me from the slums of Queens to California, where one summer afternoon me and Kip, or Half Sack as we liked to call him, were hanging out by the beach, I would never have excepted my life to turn around so fast.


	12. Chapter 12

**_Alright guys, this is it. The last chapter. I know it's really choppy and maybe rushed a little bit. I promise it will all make sense later. So enjoy + more at the bottom!_**

* * *

**_Chapter Twelve_**

Jax walked across the desert, extending his hand toward Lin, nodding as he did so. It wasn't that Jax didn't like Lin, the guy was just smug all the time. He knew that what he was about to do, the deal he was about to make, it would affect the club, but right now, he didn't care. Juice didn't deserve to sit at that table, he is a rat bastard, and how the guys could just look the other way, never made any sense. How he got voted down never made any sense either and all because of some dumb blond junkie mom, she could stay alive, she had to die. Jax had made the call, but knew better then telling the entire club, he had to keep it quiet, so he relied on Juice, it was his way of getting back on Jax's good side after the Miles thing. Or maybe it wasn't any of that. Maybe deep down inside, Jax knew all along that he resented Juice in some way. Maybe it was because, although Juice never had a real family after his mother died, and his father was black and had nothing to do with him, and his crazy ass sister hated him, Juice turned to Jax's family. Gemma was like everyone's surrogate mother or den mother. She always looked out for the guys. Clay, for whatever reason, was more of a father to Juice than he was to Jax. That was something he despised to no end. His first father was dead, his second father preferred Juice over Jax, and it was proven multiple times with fists flying between the two of them. How many times did Jax think about going Nomad just to get away from all of Clays shit, but then there was always Juice, sitting pretty right next to Clay like some sort of puppy dog waiting for its owners affection.

"So what is it you need my help with?" Lin asked.

"I have a guy that needs to be taken out on the down low "What do I get out of it?"

"I'll give you the gun trade."

"How can you make the work, you're not even a patch in your own club anymore."

"I will make it work, just leave that to me and the club, I need you to do this for me. There will be no retaliation, I promise you that."

* * *

Nikki walked down the aisles of the baby store, smiling. Anyone looking at her could see she was walking on cloud nine. She was glowing, and happy, although she wasn't showing just yet, in fact her stomach was still flat, just the thought of a baby inside of her, and not just anyone's baby, but Juices baby, now that was something all in itself.

She stopped at a rack of baby clothes, blues and pinks and yellows filled her vision. She started to wonder, and put her hand across her abdomen, "Boy or girl, both? What if there is two in there?" Even that very thought couldn't break her from her happiness. She would take whatever she was given, and this time, no one or nothing would break her family, she would make sure of that.

She picked up a small yellow onesie with a freshly hatched owl on it, below it in black print it read: **Just hatched**

Nikki always had a fascination with owls; they were cute, curious birds. She cradled the onesie in her arm, as she made her way to the check stand. She paid for the small outfit and headed home.

* * *

Juice had big plans, asking Gemma over to the house, he needed her help. Nikki walked through the door, a smile plastered to her face. "Babe, come here, I have to show you what I bought!"

Juice did as he was told, walking over to her, shirtless and smiling. She smiled back at him, wrapping herself around him. He leaned down, and embraced her, kissing her. "What did you buy?" She smiled, and pulled out the small yellow owl onesie, and held it up. Juices face lit up, as if seeing the piece of baby clothing made it real. "We are having a baby, like we are really having a baby." He said, "This is crazy!" And laughed at the fact, it was crazy, both of them so young and still naïve about life, those two people would bring a child into this world. The love they shared between them, they would do a wonderful job of bringing up this child, Juice would make sure of that. He wouldn't be like Jax, only there part time. Sure the man loved his kids, but he could've been a better parent. Juice would make sure he was to this child. He would be there, he wouldn't let his child get taken by anyone, and he sure as hell wouldn't make the mother of his child want to take his kid and run, not like Tara did with Abel and Thomas, that wouldn't happen.

A knock on the door pulled Juice from his thoughts, and he let go of Nikki to answer the door.

"Hi baby." Gemma greeted with a kiss to Juices cheek. Gemma and Nikki had met briefly, and what Nikki knew about Gemma, she liked her. She was a motherly type person, she seemed caring enough, and the hug and kiss to the cheek only confirmed it for her.

"So what's this big thing you need help with?" Gemma asked. Instead of answering her question, Nikki lifted up the baby onesie to her stomach with a smile to her face. Gemma's face went from serious to joyous in an instant. "No!" She said, smiling. "You're pregnant?" Gemma asked, not really needing the confirmation, but needing it at the same time. "Yeah." Nikki replied. "Oh baby, that's wonderful. I'm going to be a grandma again!" Gemma was clearly happy about the news, and taking Juice into her arms, she gave him another kiss, and did the same to Nikki.

"We thought we should tell everyone, and we thought that maybe you could."

"I could do a dinner?" Gemma finished for him. "Don't worry sweetheart, I'll take care of everything. Tomorrow night we will have the big reveal."

* * *

The following night Gemma, Nikki, Lyla and Tara were buzzing around the kitchen. Gemma had told everyone that it was just a get together, and more threatening, told the guys: "You all better have your asses around that table." And because most everyone was terrified of Gemma, they all nodded and told her they would be there.

Everyone was sitting around the table, which was filled with food, laughter, and warmth, however one person was not so thrilled to be sharing the meal. Jax was staring Juice down, and the looks did not go unnoticed. Gemma and Juice had both noticed, the only difference between the two, Juice kept a smile on his face and ignored Jax for Nikki's sake. Gemma wasn't so nice, "Come help me in the kitchen with something." Gemma said, tapping Jax's shoulder. Jax nodded, and followed his mother into the kitchen.

"Mind telling me why you are killing Juice with your eyes, don't think that no one notices."

"It's between him and me, mom."

"If it is because of what happened between the two of you, and the whole patch thing, can you put it to the side just for tonight? It's a special night, and maybe after you find out why, you might have a change of heart."

"Why?"

Half way through the meal Juice stood up, Nikki standing next to him, "We have some news." Juice said.

"I'm pregnant!" Nikki said in the most happy and cheerful voice. Although she hardly knew the guys, and kept her distance, everyone stood and applauded the couple. They all took turns hugging Nikki and Juice and personally congratulating them, and even going as far as telling them they would be there for whatever they needed. It was the first time Nikki felt like she was back in a family environment. This family of bikers and outlaws, they were her new family now.

* * *

**_Alright, so this is the end, but don't worry, I am working on the second series, which will be called The Butterflies Nest. Also let me know what you guys are thinking with the whole Jax and Lin thing, I'm curious to hear your ideas! Also after you are done reading and reviewing this chapter, go over and read my new Slash fic called: Electric._**


	13. Chapter 13

**_I just want to say a quick thank you to everyone who followed and reviewed this story. I means so much to me!_**

**_Also all the wonderful reviews, and mentions of me being a talented writer and that I should write for Hollywood, thank you, but I'm not that good, haha._**

**_Also this is just to update all of you lovelies and let you all now that the sequel to this story is now up, and it is called The Butterflies Nest. Hope you all enjoy it, and Read and Review!_**


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